the tummy show-and-tell

today for my show-and-tell i brought my mummy tummy...oh wait, that goes with me everywhere at all times. every time i look in the mirror, every time i glance down at my children, every time I bend over and feel the fat squish out of my pants, every time i squat down to get on the same level as my two and a half year old. what i wouldn't give to not have to see that part of my body anymore. that along with the stretch marks, and i am a wreck. 

i know and i agree that my children were worth the permanent scars my body bears - the squishy belly, the stretch marks, the saggy boobs, the wide hips, the slow metabolism. but i'm not going to lie, it isn't easy to accept. obviously, or i wouldn't be here, on this blog, inviting someone, anyone, to relate. 

 i want to use this blog to share exactly the things i've been doing in the gym, with my diet, with my supplementation, anything and everything that i have tried and read about trying. everyone seems to have a different idea of what i should be doing differently, what next thing i should try. kinda tired of it, just saying. i don't know where this weight loss thing is going, honestly. i definetely did not think it would take this long, or be this hard. it has never been this way for me in the past. there is so much more to my life than my weight struggles, but it has affected every single area these days, and i'm interested in discovering why, and what i can learn from this struggle. it's a mind battle, it's an emotional battle, it's a lies v. truth battle, every single day. sound familiar? this might not be pretty. 

i want to validate with my stories every mom out there who is trying to get back some of their old, pre-kid self; not because we don't want our kids, or because we regret having them in any way, but because maybe when i can get some of my 'self' back, i have more of me to give out to my kids, husband, friends, even strangers, and maybe this part should be at the beginning, because i'll ENJOY myself and my life that much more. 

anyway, i hope you'll join me, keep me company, share your frustrations, successes, or anything you want. cheeers.